"Yes, and..."

My childhood was all "Yes, but...".  

Yes, I'd love to come over for a play date, but I can't because you have dogs and I'm allergic. Yes, I'd love to have a piece of your birthday cake but it has tree nuts and I'm allergic. Yes, I'd love to go outside and play but I'll get asthma and be allergic. 

Real yes, buts, serious ones one that if I ignored had serious health consequences, but yes buts all the same. And it conditioned me and my interactions with the world in a very specific way.

I became aware of this subtle and powerful conditioning in my teens and twenties and worked very hard in the ensuing years to undo all those "yes, but..." sentences, thoughts and perceptions; to increase spontaneity while staying safe. I started this blog to explore that concept; I wrote my book about how to say "yes, and..." stay safe, and I coach adults, families, children and teens about how to do say "Yes!" in their every day lives while having a plan.

I thought I had excised all of my yes, buts. Then I signed up for a comedy improvisation class at The Pit. It was a stressful, unknown, new situation and I discovered all of those yes, buts waiting for me and flying out of my mouth at any chance they got.

The core premise of improv is to say "Yes, and..." to your partner. It means not merely being spontaneous, which again, as someone with a severe medical condition can be challenging at the best of times, but to say "Yes!" to everything presented, which will open up you and the scene to new pathways or to something potentially funny or brilliant or clever or goofy or simply bring the scene to the next place.

Here's an article New York Times article about the tenets of improv in a business setting.

Here is a podcast that will go live on Thursday May 15, 2012 by my Level 0 instructor, Rachel Oakes.

Even considering an improv class was a huge yes but as in my head, I thought: "Yes! It sounds like fun but I'm terrified of acting on stage." I love speaking in public to groups large or small. Love it! Have no fear. Training during graduate school for my poetry master's degree is a huge contributor to that love, no doubt. When you have to get up there week after week, reading your own poetry, which is usually very personal, you overcome any fear about being exposed and become easy with being at the podium or on stage - at least I did. But acting?! As someone else?! On stage?! Terrifying. I have experience in that as well as I took after-school classes at The Actors Studio starting at seven, continued for years, and disliked every second of it. So, knowing this about myself and that the core of improv was acting and that yes, and, I challenged myself by signing up.

When under pressure in class, I fell back on old habits of yes buts. I set up challenges, blocks or yes, butted my partners versus yes, anding them. What an incredible insight and learning experience and three hours of laughing at each other and our selves. It was liberating in way I hadn't expected, insight-giving in a way I hadn't anticipated and fulfilling in a way I couldn't have known ahead of time. I'm going back for another round, the next level of classes and this one has a show at the end of it. (Eek!) That truly is my worst yes but - a live show - and I'm doing it anyway!

***

Do you find yourself or your food allergic loved one yes, butting or yes, anding their life? Start listening closer and see how many yes and or yes buts you say in a day, or a week, when stressed or when happy?

Maialino, Gluten-Free Pasta

Two gluten-free pasta dishes side by side.

Chef Nick Anderer has taken "gluten-free" to heart.

Last summer, when we did the NY1 restaurant week spot, Chef Nick, Executive Chef and part owner of the beautiful Maialino in the Gramercy Park Hotel talked about how accommodating his restaurant is for their patrons with dietary restrictions. He then told me that they had dried gluten-free corn-based pasta in the back in case anyone requested it. I had my first taste that day, on camera (I think that shoy was cut) and it quickly became my favorite dish on the menu (before that I hadn't ordered any pasta mainly proteins and veggies - all fab and allergen-free for me).

As of January 2012, Chef Nick and his team took it several steps farther by creating their own fresh, gluten-free pasta in-house with a base of rice flour. I was at Maialino for a meeting last week, and I was able to try this new, and rather, miraculous creation.

Before I did, Chef went over the ingredients used in the new pasta and brought out a bag of their  dried pasta for me to look at, as well. We went over the ingredients in both pasta sauces - the sausage they make in house, no nuts only fennel seeds - and all passed my internal vetting process. I tried a new pasta and new pasta sauce and compared it to my now favorite corn-based gluten-free pasta.

My favorite dish, picture below, was wonderful as always: all'Amatriciana. The dried corn-based pasta tastes very close to its wheat-full cousin - I had some additional non-gluten-free testers on this project who agreed.

Penne all'Amatriciana

However, the gluten-free fresh, rice based fettuccine should be in its own category of "oh my goodness". I haven't had fresh pasta since, well, the mid-2000s and I don't know if I recall that it was this good. This pasta was light, fresh tasting, soft but perfectly cooked and the yellow color comes from the addition of eggs - which just made me happy to look at. The fettuccine strands were clearly made with skill, and I have to say it, love.

Fettuccine with sausage

Very Important Nota Bene: Chef Nick said they make the fresh gluten-free pasta in the same room that they make their fresh wheat-based pasta. They use all precautions to keep ingredients separate and uncontaminated but he stressed that it is important for a potential fresh GF pasta diner to know that. I had no issues but I am only wheat intolerant, not allergic nor celiac. So, this pasta may or not be appropriate for your needs
, depending.

Thank you Maialino Team - I am over the moon with this dish and Chef Nick for taking the initiative to create it. I can't wait to head back!

FAAN, FAI Merge, 2012

Just in from Facebook: FAAN and FAI to merge by the end of 2012. Press releases from FAAN and FAI:

We are pleased to inform you that the nation’s two leading food allergy organizations are uniting to advance a cure and promote education for food allergy. The Food Allergy & Anaphylaxis Network (FAAN) and the Food Allergy Initiative (FAI) today announced their intent to merge, pending regulatory approvals.

Here is a helpful Q&A from FAAN about the merger. 

Sisterhood, NYTimes

I talk about safe friends on this blog, in my book, in coaching sessions and in the talks that I gave during the FAAN conferences about building food allergy confidence. Generally speaking, a safe friend, in my definition is: non-judgmental, supportive, flexible, open, understanding that food allergies are a medical need ("safe" for you is whatever you make it).  

Recently, the New York Times agreed (more or less): “Researchers have lately gathered abundant evidence that female friendship is one of nature’s preferred narrative tools.”  From the New York Times, The Spirit of Sisterhood Is in the Air and on the Air: 

"You have to have somebody to hang onto,” Dr. Seyfarth said. “A friend gives you an element of predictability and certainty, and you can use that to buffer you against all the things you don’t have control over. There’s a biochemical component to this.” A familiar friend calms and equilibrates, mops up the cortisol spills that can weaken the immune system, and in so doing may help lengthen life — in baboons, humans and other group-minded kinds. “Yes, having coffee with friends is good for you,” Dr. Silk said, “and we should all do it often."

Can you equally point to the supporters in your life who truly get your dietary restrictions? I hope yes! Now take that knowledge and help your child to find those people in their lives. Whether two years old or 20, safe friendships abound. Find them, lean on them. Need some assistance finding a safe friend? I’m here -  ask me!

Wine, Food Allergies

I wrote about allergens in the wine making process eons ago (here and here) but now there’s a new trend about transparency in labeling. See this story from The Washington Post:

"Wine’s dirty little secret is that it isn’t just fermented grape juice. It might include added sugar, tartaric acid, various yeasts and yeast nutrients, color enhancers, gum arabic, gelatin, egg whites, fish bladders (isinglass) and any of a long list of other additives allowed by the federal government but not required to be listed on the wine label. That color and mouth feel you love, even the flavor, might come not from grapes, but from a jar."

Questions? I know you’ve got them. Go back to your board certified allergist about what is right for you and your needs concern wine and allergens. Need an allergist? Go to AAAAI, or ACAAI to find a local allergist near you.

Plentils, Enjoy Life Foods

I’m mental for Plentils. I received samples from Enjoy Life Foods of each flavor a few weeks back and thought: oh, I’ll just try one chip of each flavor, to get a sense, ya know – no biggie. Ahem, I had one bag. Of each flavor. By myself. Which means, I liked them. A lot.

I’m not a snacker by nature; I’m not a chocolate person or salty treat person but I gobbled these up. My favorite right now is the pizza flavor but the dill and sour cream is a close second.  Truly, I loved them all and they are all the more delectable because they are made from one of my trusted brands Enjoy Life Foods who makes top 8 free goodies.

Yes, top 8 allergen-free. So even though they have dairy-tasting flavors they have no diary in them. Here is their nutritional information and Enjoy Life Foods's allergen policies.

When I asked point blank how these tasted like dairy yet contain no diary, here’s Enjoy Life's official statement: “We utilize the assistance of flavor manufacturers, who, through the use of natural flavors create a proprietary mix that reproduces the taste and olfactory properties of dairy without using actual dairy ingredients.”

If you have a dairy allergic loved one, contact Enjoy Life Foods directly about your needs. Take into deep consideration that eating a dairy-tasting product, may not be for you either emotionally and physically.

If you have a peanut and/or legume allergic loved one, check with your board certified allergist about the best course of action for you with a product made from lentils.


If you want to try some for FREE, please sign up to my newsletter. For Food Allergy Awareness Month (May 2012), Enjoy Life Foods will be giving away the whole line (4 flavors) to three lucky winners. But you have to be signed up to enter! Good luck and thank you Enjoy Life Foods for another delicious, safe treat!

Tarrytown, NY, FAAN Conference 2012

What a wonderful day in Tarrytown this Saturday for the FAAN conference speaking, meeting and interacting with all of you!

First, in the morning session, I conducted the Adults with Food Allergies Workshop. Many adults had children heading into college or just graduating, so we turned our attention to my strategies to assist young adults as well as help parents cope with this life transition. 

Just getting starting in the adult workshop.

Next, I spoke in the big room to all attendees about food allergy confidence and my motto: Just because you have a restricted diet, doesn't mean you have a restricted life.
 

Get that woman a step stool.

And lastly, I spent about an hour with the teens, talking about food allergy confidence, dining out, and comparing asthma notes (and inhalers). 

In between sessions, I had a chance to meet all of you, your wonderful children, your supportive spouses, your outspoken teenagers and sign books and take pictures. 

About to head into keynote speech & signing books!

 

I won't be in Anaheim, CA this year (I have a destination wedding that weekend - which I will be writing about I'm going to handle the food situation there), but I will be rolling out some news ways to connect with the information presented in these conferences if you weren't able to attend.

So stay tuned to this space. Also, I have extra books from the conference. If you'd like a signed copy, you can purchase one from me here for a limited time only!

Signed Allergic Girl Books Sale!

I have TEN Allergic Girl books leftover from the FAAN conferences and no closet space to hold them.

I’m offering these extra copies to you, my readers, at an exclusive, one-time only price: $25.00 USD.


(Includes shipping within the continental US and good through May 19, 2012 or I run out of copies.) 

Three great reasons to buy from me, right now:

1. A portion of the proceeds goes to FAAN.
2. They make a great gift for Food Allergy Awareness Week.
3. When you buy through me, I will inscribe them!

The pay button is on the upper right hand corner of this blog.


Email me with the name to whom I should inscribe your book(s) and I will ship them out right away.

Kumquat Marmalade

I was in my favorite market, Fairway, and there were stacked containers of kumquats by the entryway. Without thinking I picked one up and announced to myself: I’m going to make kumquat marmalade. Have I ever made marmalade before? Nope. But the kumquats were just too pretty to pass up. And I love marmalade.

So this Sunday, I did a quick Google search for how to make marmalade knowing that I didn’t want to officially can it, I wanted something easy and straightforward with few ingredients and I had a hunch I wouldn’t need pectin. I found a  simple recipe that I adapted from Recipe Girl.

***
Here's Recipe Girl's recipe for kumquat marmalade
Yield: 2 cups
Prep Time: 40 min Cook Time: 16 min
An easy, microwave recipe for Kumquat Marmalade. This recipe will keep for two months in the refrigerator.

Ingredients:
1 pound kumquats (more or less)
1 medium orange, peeled- white pith removed, and chopped
1 1/2 cups granulated white sugar (more or less)
1/2 medium (2 Tablespoons) lemon, squeezed

directions:
1. Rinse kumquats and remove any stems. Slice the ends off of each kumquat & discard.

2. Cut each kumquat in half and carefully cut out white pith and seeds; discard.

3. Chop halved kumquats & pulp coarsely; place into a food processor along with the chopped orange. Pulse until kumquats are chopped more finely and somewhat liquefied.

4. Measure the mixture at this point and pour it into a bowl. Add equal amounts of sugar to the kumquat mixture (ie. 2 cups of kumquat mixture will need 2 cups of sugar). Mix in sugar and add 2 Tablespoons lemon juice.

5. Microwave on high (uncovered) for 6 minutes, giving the mixture a chance to boil.

6. Stir, and continue to microwave in 2 minute bursts (stirring after each burst) for a total of 10 minutes.

7. Remove from microwave, stir and let cool at room temperature. The marmalade will thicken as it cools.

8. Keep marmalade in an airtight container; refrigerate for up to 2 months. Freeze for up to 6 months.



***

Here are my Allergic Girl adaptations.
I topped and tailed the kumquats, de-pithed them and then chopped into segments. (I didn’t use a food processor). I put those segments into a container, eyeballed how much they filled the container and then placed them in a large bowl. I then measured sugar in the raw in the same container to the same level, again eyeballing how much. I peeled one navel orange, chopped that into small pieces and add that to the large bowl with the kumquats. I quartered a lemon, ready for squeezing into the mix. Then I added all ingredients to a pot, brought the mixture to a boil and then cooked the slurry on medium heat, stirring often for approximately 30 minutes. It perfectly jelled into a delicious kumquat marmalade!

My Kumquat Lady Marmalade

The Cooking Chanel, Allergic Girl

I love that the segment for Al Roker’s My Life in Food that I did last year for The Cooking Chanel is still running – it means more of you might feel like this woman who Facebooked me:

"Just watched an episode of "My Life in Food" on The Cooking Channel, which had you... My daughter has multiple food allergies & its been a total roller coaster. Glad to know there's others who really do understand."

Here's the show if you haven’t yet seen it. From "My Life in Food":